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I have always been perplexed by forms that ask me (1) my age and (2) my birthdate. If you have my birthdate, then you know my age, no? So you must be asking for something other than my chronological age when you ask my age, since you already know my age.

This is akin to asking (1) where I live and (2) my address.

Or (1) What is your gender? and (2) Are you male, female, or other?

And so on.

So, I have decided that when someone asks my age, knowing my birthdate, they're actually asking my FELT age. Which is how I come by 45.2.

Last year, it was 45.1. The year before, it was 45, which is the year I realized that something terribly wrong was happening because my chronological age was advancing at a speed rapidly outpacing my sense of self.

So I decided to put a halt to the aging process.

This year, I will turn 45.3. Unless I decided otherwise. However, at this point, less than month from that next birthday, I am inclined to stick with the .3 appendage.

I will eventually be faced with The Big 46. Or maybe not. Maybe I'll just move into the hundredths place.



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